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Religious jokes
God created the donkey &
said to him : "
You will work unceasingly from sunrise to sunset
carrying burdens
on your back. You will eat grass, you will have no
intelligence &
you will live 50 years.
You will be a donkey. " The donkey answered: "
I will be a donkey,
but to live 50 years is too much. Give me only
20 years. God granted his
wish.
God created the dog and said to
him: "You will be a dog. " You will
guard the house of man. You
will be his best friend. You will eat the
scraps that he gives you and
you will live 25 years. You will be a dog.
" The dog answered: "
Sir, to live 25 years is too much, you give me
only 10 years. God
granted his wish. God created the Monkey and said to
him: " You will
be a monkey. " You will swing from branch to branch
doing tricks.
You will be amusing and you will live 20 years. You will
be a monkey.
" The monkey answered: " Sir, to live 20 years is too
much
, you give me only 10 years. God granted his wish.
Finally God
created the man and said to him: " You will be a man, the
only
rational creature on the face of the earth. " You will use your
intelligence to become master over all animals. You will dominate the
world
and you will live 20 years. Man responded: " Sir, I will be a man
but to live only 20 years is very little, give the 30 years that the
donkey refused, the 15 years that the dog did not want and the 10 years
the monkey refused. God granted his wish. And since then, man lives
20
years as a man, he marries and spend 30 years like a donkey,
working and
carrying all the burdens on his back. Then when his
children are gone,
he lives 15 years like a dog, taking care of the house
and eating
whatever is given to him, so that when he is old, he can
retire and live 10
years like a monkey, going from house to house,
from one son or
daughter to another, doing tricks to amuse
his grandchildren.
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| Jokes 1 - 20 of 46 for this category |
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| | | | | 1. | 3rd Loong List - One Liners Q. What's the difference between driving in the fog and eating pussy?
A. At least when you're eatin... | | | | | 2. | Another Loong List One Liners Q. How do you embarrass an archaeologist?
A. Give him a used tampon and ask him what period it came... | | | | | 3. | Time jokes When do clocks die?
When their time is up.... | | | | | 4. | Humor jokes Do you believe in love at first sight or do I have to walk by again?... | | | | | 5. | Hair and bald jokes Your so bald, I can see what your thinking.... | | | | | 6. | Don't Be a Sexist Don't be sexist. Broads hate that!... | | | | | 7. | Super Looong List of One-Liners! Q. What would happen if the Pilgrims had killed cats instead of turkeys?
A. We'd eat pussy every Th... | | | | | 8. | Did you here about the new atomic cocktail? Did you here about the new atomic cocktail?
one sip & you go out with a poof :0)Sent by Peter... | | | | | 9. | Harley and Hoover Q. What Is The Difference Between a Harley And a Hoover?
A. The Location Of The Dirt Bag... | | | | | 10. | Titantic Q. What Kind Of Coffee Was Served On The Titanic?
A. Sanka... | | | | | 11. | Roast Beef And Pea Soup Q. What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup?
A. Anyone Can Roast Beef... | | | | | 12. | Bullfighters Q. What Do You Call Four Bullfighters In Quicksand?
A. Quattro Sinko... | | | | | 13. | Cheese Q. What Do You Call Cheese That Isn't Yours?
A. Nacho Cheese.... | | | | | 14. | Boomerang Q. What Do You Call a Boomerang That Doesn't work?
A. A Stick... | | | | | 15. | Esimos Q. What Do Eskimos Get From Sitting On The Ice too Long?
A. Polaroid's... | | | | | 16. | Holy Water Q. How Do You Get Holy Water?
A. You Boil The Hell Out Of It.... | | | | | 17. | Fish Q. What Do Fish Say When They Hit a Concrete Wall?
A. Dam!... | | | | | 18. | Crazy People in the Forest Q. How Do Crazy People Go Through The Forest?
A. They Take The Psycho Path... | | | | | 19. | ouch Q: What did the egg say to the pot of boiling water?
A: It may take me a while to get hard—I just... | | | | | 20. | Boxing Legend Q: Why does Mike Tyson always cry during sex?
A: Mace.... | | |
| Jokes 1 - 20 of 46 for this category |
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Little Johnny's mother decided to give...
Little Johnny's mother decided to give her son an anatomy lesson one day, so she took off all of her clothes and pointed to her vagina, and said, "Johnny. This is where you come from." Johnny went to school the next day smiling and insisting all his friends now refer to him as "Lucky Johnny." "Why?" one asked. Johnny held his fingers an inch apart and said, "Because I came this close to being a turd." |
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